Reasonable Pain

I'm understandably anxious about my health while pregnant. I try to limit my fears to reasonable ones. There are so many to have. It seems that everything is dangerous for pregnant women. We should all be packed in bubble wrap and fed a safe solution of necessary nutrients so that we don't accidentally eat fish with too much mercury or lettuce or lunch meat with listeria (one I do worry about after the salad recall that cleared Kroger's shelves) or cats (a joke from my first visit with nurse during my first pregnancy). Every visit with my OB includes a list of things to watch for and entreaties to come to the hospital if I have any of those problems. I always tell them, "Don't worry. If anything is troubling, I will absolutely come to the hospital." The trouble is figuring out whether something is troubling. Blood is always troubling and would, of course, send me to the hospital. But what about the symptoms for preeclampsia? Headache and swelling of face, hands, or feet. Is every headache a potential problem? If I have a headache and swollen ankles (fairly common late in pregnancy), is that a problem? And since my cervix was measured and found short, which tends to happen in women with a history of pre-term labor, should I scrutinize every ache and pain to make sure it's not a contraction? If I have a headache, I ask Matt if I look puffy. He's honest, so I don't worry about his saying, "No, dear, you look radiant." If I hurt, I sit down and sometimes take some Tylenol. Tylenol wouldn't do anything for labor pains, so if it helps, I'm probably not in labor. I also try to consider what I was doing before the pain started. Did I over-exert? Did I lift something lighter than a cast iron dutch oven that was still too heavy for me?

So today I hurt and had a headache. I was fairly certain that both were caused by unusual exertion, but I hurt pretty bad. The unusual exertion was running across campus to catch Lucy. She wanted to play on the steps under the clock tower (one of her favorite things to do) while Matt dropped off some paperwork at an office, so I said I could handle watching her while she played on the steps. We were fine for a while. Then she headed down the sidewalk between the theater and Carter Hall. I followed. She picked up speed, so I told her to stop. That's when she bolted. She ran downhill toward the chapel, which is bordered on two sides by roads and on another side by a parking lot. She turned toward the road she would have to cross to get to Chik-Fil-A. I ran as fast as I could and faster than I should have to catch her before she got to the road. Just in front of the chapel, I grabbed her hair because that was what I could reach and stopped her. Both panting, we collapsed in the grass. "Mama pull me hair" was Lucy's response. "I can't take you anywhere. I can't keep up with you to keep you safe" was my response. If I can't watch her for a few minutes on campus, I really can't take her anywhere. What if I had fallen? What if I hadn't reached Lucy before she reached the road? I took her hand and walked her back up the hill with only a little protest from her, which is fortunate because I couldn't have carried her up the hill. We would have had to sit and wait for Matt to find us.

So I hurt bad. I had a headache. I felt like I had strained something in my lower abdomen. My back hurt, both through my ribs and my lower back. I started having small back spasms, which were potentially concerning after the back labor I had with Lucy. Quite honestly, everything below my hair and above my knees hurt. I was also a little worried about the jostling that Emmie got, but she didn't seem to mind. She's stayed perky this afternoon and evening. I took Tylenol and lay down for a nap after we got home. I woke up about 45 minutes later and still hurt, so I rolled over and napped some more. A little later, I felt a little better but still hurt, so I rolled over and napped some more. I napped until I stopped hurting. I'm still a little sore and stiff and have taken more Tylenol. The good news is that this is reasonable pain with an identifiable cause, not the alarming kind that would send me to the hospital. But until the Tylenol and napping kicked in, I was a bit worried as well as sore and exhausted. That's not a fun combination.

Lucy is indefinitely grounded, especially since telling her to stop made her run. I'm not taking her anywhere alone without her being strapped into a stroller or cart. I can't do it while I'm pregnant or recovering or hauling around a newborn. I like for her to move around and explore, but keeping her alive and safe is a higher priority. I'm sure it will hurt her feelings sometimes that mama won't let her run, but that, too, is a reasonable pain.