This week was certainly better than last week. Again today Emmie passed her BPP very quickly. We also got to see her swallow a little. My fluid was 11, a little higher than it has been but still at the low end of normal. Today was culture day, so I got swabbed for Group B Strep and examined. My cervix is a firm 2 (not a ripe 2). The nurse practitioner seemed to think that cervical dilation might be another reason to bump our delivery date sooner. She also measured my belly with a tape measure and said that I'm measuring bigger than expected. I don't know if that's bigger than 16th percentile or bigger than anyone at 35 weeks. Either way it's a good sign that Emmie is not as small as they feared, especially since I didn't gain any weight this week. I'm not concerned about a big belly; my belly measured big with Lucy, and she was still under 8 pounds when she was born. After the office visit, we went to the hospital. It was very busy and took a while to check in. Eventually, we got to our NST, and all went well. Emmie battled one of the monitors a little. She hasn't been doing that like Neil and Lucy always did. While hooking me up to the monitors, the nurse, Connie, felt my belly to see how Emmie was positioned so that she could put the heart rate monitor in approximately the right spot. The other nurse in the room (who has felt me while hooking me up to monitors before) asked Connie if she thought Emmie felt small. They both agreed that Emmie doesn't feel especially small. Hearing multiple people say she doesn't seem small is reassuring, the exact opposite of what we felt last week. Connie asked when we would be coming next week, so we told her about Tuesday and then Wednesday in Louisville. She frowned. I was afraid she was going to say that we really needed to come in for an NST at the end of next week, so I asked why she was frowning. She said she was concerned about our toxoplasmosis result because we had enough to worry about already. She was much less concerned--in fact, she smiled--when she heard what Dr. Ackermann had said about a false positive. It's nice to know how much the nurses are rooting for us. If not for the long wait to check into the hospital, we would have gotten home in a little over 3 hours. We still got home in less than 4, so we spent about 8 hours on medical stuff, much better than last week's 11 hours.
Lucy was asleep when we left this morning. We weren't sure if it was better to wake her and immediately say goodbye or to let her sleep. We opted for sleep. Shawn was here when she woke, and I had breakfast ready for her. I haven't talked to Shawn to know how that went, but Lucy didn't seem upset about it when I asked later. Then Susie came and took Lucy outside for a little while. When they came inside, Lucy insisted on taking a bath. After Lucy's bath, Erin came to watch her for the rest of the afternoon. They watched TV, played trains, and played outside a little while, too. There were a couple of tantrums, and Lucy stubbornly sat in the stroller for 10 minutes even though Erin told her it was too hot to go for a walk. But it seems things went pretty well. And we were home before 2:00. I made sure that Lucy got cuddle time as soon as we got home and again before I took a nap and again after my nap. In fact, we're still cuddling.
I needed the nap because I didn't sleep well last night. I was hurting when I went to bed and took some Tylenol. When I woke up a couple hours later, I still hurt. Eventually, I got up and took a warm bath with Epsom salts. When I got out of the tub, I didn't hurt anymore, but I felt jittery and had trouble settling down. I now wonder if the mid-evening Coke Icee I had was too much caffeine too late. During all of this, Emmie was really active. She's never been so active. Part of the time she had hiccups. I was a little worried that all her activity would make her lethargic today, but it seems like it just got her warmed up. I was awake for about three hours in the middle of the night before falling back asleep for four more hours. I think I just overdid it yesterday. I never felt like I was overdoing it, but apparently it all added up and caught up with me.
Our plans for the weekend include resting and cleaning. And I have a little more work to do in the garden if weather allows. I want to get my squash plants transplanted in the ghetto. And I want to plant green beans, purple hull peas, corn, snap peas, herbs and chard in the Pea Haven. That sounds like a lot because of the variety, but the quantities aren't large. Hopefully, we can get the house straightened out this weekend so that if we have a baby in week 36, we're prepared.
Friday, April 29, 2016
Monday, April 25, 2016
Appointment 34-2: How do you spell relief?
Today's appointment went much better. Emmie passed the BPP in 10 minutes. She moved and breathed right away. The thing that took the longest was finding enough fluid. The first two times Jenny measured, she came up with around 7.5. They want me to have at least 8. The third time she checked, Emmie had moved and revealed a couple pockets of fluid, and we measured over 10. The average was a little over 8, so we passed. My blood pressure was good. I'd lost a pound or two because the warm weather encourages me to eat more produce and be more active outdoors. Emmie's heart rate was good, too.
Dr. Ackermann was happy with our progress. I asked what we were going to do about the toxoplasmosis. He said that he thought it was a false positive. He said that pregnancy causes all IgM scores to go up, and my score was just barely positive. And my IgG score was negative, which would be odd if my positive score was so low that it looked like I was recovering from the infection. He also said that toxoplasmosis is so rare that he's never had a patient actually have a true positive result. The rarity isn't necessarily reassuring. We've had other rare problems before. I asked if we should retest to verify the result. He said that you can't retest for a month, and I'll have a baby by then. I asked if treating me would have enough benefits to outweigh possible side effects. He said, "That's why I'm referring you to Louisville." They deal with high risk pregnancies and would be more familiar with what the options are and which make the most sense for us now. So we're going to Louisville again. The referral was faxed to Louisville, and they should contact me in the next two days to set up the appointment. We have to get one soon, or we may have a baby before we can have an appointment.
Then we went to the hospital for the NST. I ate a snack on the way so that I wouldn't be hungry this time, and maybe Emmie would be more active. The nurse also brought me a ham sandwich to eat during the test. Emmie appreciated the sandwich. Just to be sure that she was active enough, I rested my tablet on my belly while I read (she kicks things that rest on my belly) and pressed the television remote to my belly like an ultrasound wand, which also gets her stirred up sometimes. She showed enough reactivity to pass her NST the first time they came to look at the tape.
If we hadn't had such a long wait in the waiting room, we would have gotten through all of it in less than 4 hours, a long time but an improvement over the five- and six-hour days we had last week. It was a much better day than either day last week. The Louisville appointment will replace a Lebanon appointment, so it won't add craziness to our schedule. It may even make things easier because Lucy can come to Louisville with us. She's allowed in the ultrasound there.
Speaking of Lucy, she had another good day. Matt's co-worker (and our friend) Justy kept Lucy for the afternoon. Justy has a 4-5 year old daughter who has played with Lucy before, so Lucy had a good time. She did freak out when she had to get into Justy's red van because it wasn't her own blue car. But she recovered quickly. When we went to pick Lucy up, she was running around the front yard in a nightgown that looks like a princess dress. The girls were playing with a younger girl that Lucy knows from MOPS. Lucy was very sweet with the smaller girl. She hugged her and put her arm around her. Lucy plays with other kids so infrequently that it's always interesting to see how she interacts. Apparently, she's very sweet and big sister-like. That's good news.
I'm still feeling well. Most of the time I don't feel huge or heavy. I've had only a little heartburn. I do seem to go from starving to stuffed quickly because Emmie is squishing my stomach. I still get occasional pains where my stretch marks are stretching just a little more. The nurse thought my ankles were retaining a bit of fluid today, but they didn't look bad to me. I'm not always sleeping well, but it's hard to fit three people and my belly in our full-size bed. I eventually move to the recliner. Sometimes I get back to sleep, and sometimes I give up and do laundry or something else productive. Overall, these don't seem to be bad symptoms for the last few weeks of pregnancy.
Emmie is getting bigger and more active. She likes back rubs. She seems to like story time with Lucy when Matt or I read books to them. She gets excited when Lucy is loud. She doesn't seem to have favorite foods, but she appreciates a meal. I got her to play pat-pat with me a couple days ago. I pat my belly three times and say "pat, pat, pat," and she taps back twice. We're 3/3 for babies who play pat-pat before they're born. We'll see what else we can learn about her in the next few weeks before we meet her.
Our next appointment is Friday unless we get a Louisville appointment very quickly that would replace the Lebanon appointment. We'll be at 35 weeks by then, no more than 3 weeks from a baby if all goes well.
Dr. Ackermann was happy with our progress. I asked what we were going to do about the toxoplasmosis. He said that he thought it was a false positive. He said that pregnancy causes all IgM scores to go up, and my score was just barely positive. And my IgG score was negative, which would be odd if my positive score was so low that it looked like I was recovering from the infection. He also said that toxoplasmosis is so rare that he's never had a patient actually have a true positive result. The rarity isn't necessarily reassuring. We've had other rare problems before. I asked if we should retest to verify the result. He said that you can't retest for a month, and I'll have a baby by then. I asked if treating me would have enough benefits to outweigh possible side effects. He said, "That's why I'm referring you to Louisville." They deal with high risk pregnancies and would be more familiar with what the options are and which make the most sense for us now. So we're going to Louisville again. The referral was faxed to Louisville, and they should contact me in the next two days to set up the appointment. We have to get one soon, or we may have a baby before we can have an appointment.
Then we went to the hospital for the NST. I ate a snack on the way so that I wouldn't be hungry this time, and maybe Emmie would be more active. The nurse also brought me a ham sandwich to eat during the test. Emmie appreciated the sandwich. Just to be sure that she was active enough, I rested my tablet on my belly while I read (she kicks things that rest on my belly) and pressed the television remote to my belly like an ultrasound wand, which also gets her stirred up sometimes. She showed enough reactivity to pass her NST the first time they came to look at the tape.
If we hadn't had such a long wait in the waiting room, we would have gotten through all of it in less than 4 hours, a long time but an improvement over the five- and six-hour days we had last week. It was a much better day than either day last week. The Louisville appointment will replace a Lebanon appointment, so it won't add craziness to our schedule. It may even make things easier because Lucy can come to Louisville with us. She's allowed in the ultrasound there.
Speaking of Lucy, she had another good day. Matt's co-worker (and our friend) Justy kept Lucy for the afternoon. Justy has a 4-5 year old daughter who has played with Lucy before, so Lucy had a good time. She did freak out when she had to get into Justy's red van because it wasn't her own blue car. But she recovered quickly. When we went to pick Lucy up, she was running around the front yard in a nightgown that looks like a princess dress. The girls were playing with a younger girl that Lucy knows from MOPS. Lucy was very sweet with the smaller girl. She hugged her and put her arm around her. Lucy plays with other kids so infrequently that it's always interesting to see how she interacts. Apparently, she's very sweet and big sister-like. That's good news.
I'm still feeling well. Most of the time I don't feel huge or heavy. I've had only a little heartburn. I do seem to go from starving to stuffed quickly because Emmie is squishing my stomach. I still get occasional pains where my stretch marks are stretching just a little more. The nurse thought my ankles were retaining a bit of fluid today, but they didn't look bad to me. I'm not always sleeping well, but it's hard to fit three people and my belly in our full-size bed. I eventually move to the recliner. Sometimes I get back to sleep, and sometimes I give up and do laundry or something else productive. Overall, these don't seem to be bad symptoms for the last few weeks of pregnancy.
Emmie is getting bigger and more active. She likes back rubs. She seems to like story time with Lucy when Matt or I read books to them. She gets excited when Lucy is loud. She doesn't seem to have favorite foods, but she appreciates a meal. I got her to play pat-pat with me a couple days ago. I pat my belly three times and say "pat, pat, pat," and she taps back twice. We're 3/3 for babies who play pat-pat before they're born. We'll see what else we can learn about her in the next few weeks before we meet her.
Our next appointment is Friday unless we get a Louisville appointment very quickly that would replace the Lebanon appointment. We'll be at 35 weeks by then, no more than 3 weeks from a baby if all goes well.
Thursday, April 21, 2016
Appointment 34-1: Aw crap!
We've got so many appointments lined up that I've decided to use a notation system to refer to them. This is our first appointment since reaching 34 weeks yesterday, so today's visit is 34-1. On Monday, we'll have our second appointment of this gestational week (34-2). Next Friday will be 35-1. We hope to at least reach 36-1.
Vitals
Same weight and good blood pressure for me. Emmie's heartrate was a solid 140. My fluid was only a tiny bit higher but still at the low end of normal.
BPP
She breathed for the entire BPP, way more than was necessary. She had to be prompted to move around a little. Apparently, morning is breathing time. She passed the BPP, but we went to the hospital for the NST anyway.
NST
Emmie's heart was fine, but she was not as reactive as they wanted, so I ended up being on the monitor for two hours instead of 30 minutes. After they let me eat some lunch, she became much more reactive, and we got to go home.
TORCH
The TORCH panel is the blood test they ran on Tuesday to see if I have any infections: Toxoplasmosis, Rubella, Cytomegalovirus, and Herpes Simplex. Unfortunately, in addition to the herpes we already knew about, I tested positive for toxoplasmosis. I have no symptoms, but adults don't usually show symptoms of toxoplasmosis infection. The question is whether Emmie has it.
We don't know much from our doctor yet. He thinks I've caught it fairly recently because the test differentiates between current infection (IgM) and antibodies formed from previously having the parasite (IgG). My IgM test was positive, and my IgG test was negative. Since Dr. Reynolds just has one set of test results that he got today, he can't be sure of much yet. He is going to consult with some other doctors to figure out the best thing to do now. He said he'd call when he knew more.
Matt and I have done some googling to get a better idea of what my results could mean. Here are some options:
Positive IgM, Negative IgG can indicate a false positive, so I might not have toxoplasmosis. (Unlikely, but possible.) Further testing is likely in my future.
Or Positive IgM, Negative IgG can mean I was infected, probably in the last six months.
However, positive results can occur up to a year after infection, so we don't know for sure when I got it. And timing really matters.
If I had it long enough before Emmie was conceived, then she may not have it at all. (Unlikely, but possible.)
If I had gotten it in the first trimester, she would probably be dead already or showing serious malformations, which she hasn't, so that's highly unlikely.
If I got it in the second trimester, the chances of her catching it from me are low, but the damage if she does have it would be serious. She could have calcium deposits in her brain or liver.
If I've caught it in the third trimester, then she has a good chance (at least 60%) of catching it from me, but the damage would be less severe because most organ formation was already done by then.
If she has it and appears normal at birth, she may eventually have hearing loss, vision loss, motor development delays, and/or cognitive delays due to congenital toxoplasmosis. Patients with congenital toxoplasmosis may develop eye lesions as late as age 30. Matt's googling indicated that problems often present in the teenage years.
The good news is that the doctor tested me and knows Emmie might have it. They normally don't test for it, so it was her small size and family history that prompted the testing, which found this possible problem. I may receive antibiotics, which would also help treat Emmie. Emmie can be tested via amniocentesis or after birth and receive treatment for her first year, which would lessen the severity of the damage.
So what we know is that I've tested positive for toxoplasmosis. We don't know what that means for us yet. It could mean nothing if Emmie doesn't have it. Or it could mean that my gardening caused my daughter to lose vision or hearing or to have physical or mental disabilities. (Toxoplasmosis is spread through cat feces. I don't like cats, but cats like gardens and sandboxes; so I could have caught it from my garden or Lucy's sandbox--although I've seen no evidence of feces in either place--or from under-washed produce.)
LUCY
Although we were gone for 5 hours, Lucy had a good time with Erin Steele. Erin goes to our church and is one of Matt's students. Her mom reads my blog (Hi, Alice!) and her parents let her know we needed help with Lucy. So Erin emailed Matt to offer to watch Lucy today. That was a godsend. We were scrambling to find someone to watch Lucy for an indefinite amount of time on short notice. As it so happened two of Erin's classes today were cancelled because they were Matt's classes, so that turned out well. :) Erin and Lucy played outside and inside and watched Shaun the Sheep. We asked Lucy if she would like Erin to come over and play again and got an enthusiastic YES! Erin came by later to return our keys, and Lucy cried when she left. She told me, "Me sad friend Erin go." And Erin liked it well enough to be willing to do it again sometime.
We changed our 35-1 appointment from Thursday at 8:30 to Friday at 10:30 so that Matt wouldn't have to cancel Thursday classes again next week. We were lucky they could fit us in. Erin said she could watch Lucy after noon. Now we just have to find somebody for 10-noon.
Between Tuesday and today, we spent at least 11 hours getting medical care for Emmie. We certainly hope future appointments are less dramatic and time-consuming.
Vitals
Same weight and good blood pressure for me. Emmie's heartrate was a solid 140. My fluid was only a tiny bit higher but still at the low end of normal.
BPP
She breathed for the entire BPP, way more than was necessary. She had to be prompted to move around a little. Apparently, morning is breathing time. She passed the BPP, but we went to the hospital for the NST anyway.
NST
Emmie's heart was fine, but she was not as reactive as they wanted, so I ended up being on the monitor for two hours instead of 30 minutes. After they let me eat some lunch, she became much more reactive, and we got to go home.
TORCH
The TORCH panel is the blood test they ran on Tuesday to see if I have any infections: Toxoplasmosis, Rubella, Cytomegalovirus, and Herpes Simplex. Unfortunately, in addition to the herpes we already knew about, I tested positive for toxoplasmosis. I have no symptoms, but adults don't usually show symptoms of toxoplasmosis infection. The question is whether Emmie has it.
We don't know much from our doctor yet. He thinks I've caught it fairly recently because the test differentiates between current infection (IgM) and antibodies formed from previously having the parasite (IgG). My IgM test was positive, and my IgG test was negative. Since Dr. Reynolds just has one set of test results that he got today, he can't be sure of much yet. He is going to consult with some other doctors to figure out the best thing to do now. He said he'd call when he knew more.
Matt and I have done some googling to get a better idea of what my results could mean. Here are some options:
Positive IgM, Negative IgG can indicate a false positive, so I might not have toxoplasmosis. (Unlikely, but possible.) Further testing is likely in my future.
Or Positive IgM, Negative IgG can mean I was infected, probably in the last six months.
However, positive results can occur up to a year after infection, so we don't know for sure when I got it. And timing really matters.
If I had it long enough before Emmie was conceived, then she may not have it at all. (Unlikely, but possible.)
If I had gotten it in the first trimester, she would probably be dead already or showing serious malformations, which she hasn't, so that's highly unlikely.
If I got it in the second trimester, the chances of her catching it from me are low, but the damage if she does have it would be serious. She could have calcium deposits in her brain or liver.
If I've caught it in the third trimester, then she has a good chance (at least 60%) of catching it from me, but the damage would be less severe because most organ formation was already done by then.
If she has it and appears normal at birth, she may eventually have hearing loss, vision loss, motor development delays, and/or cognitive delays due to congenital toxoplasmosis. Patients with congenital toxoplasmosis may develop eye lesions as late as age 30. Matt's googling indicated that problems often present in the teenage years.
The good news is that the doctor tested me and knows Emmie might have it. They normally don't test for it, so it was her small size and family history that prompted the testing, which found this possible problem. I may receive antibiotics, which would also help treat Emmie. Emmie can be tested via amniocentesis or after birth and receive treatment for her first year, which would lessen the severity of the damage.
So what we know is that I've tested positive for toxoplasmosis. We don't know what that means for us yet. It could mean nothing if Emmie doesn't have it. Or it could mean that my gardening caused my daughter to lose vision or hearing or to have physical or mental disabilities. (Toxoplasmosis is spread through cat feces. I don't like cats, but cats like gardens and sandboxes; so I could have caught it from my garden or Lucy's sandbox--although I've seen no evidence of feces in either place--or from under-washed produce.)
LUCY
Although we were gone for 5 hours, Lucy had a good time with Erin Steele. Erin goes to our church and is one of Matt's students. Her mom reads my blog (Hi, Alice!) and her parents let her know we needed help with Lucy. So Erin emailed Matt to offer to watch Lucy today. That was a godsend. We were scrambling to find someone to watch Lucy for an indefinite amount of time on short notice. As it so happened two of Erin's classes today were cancelled because they were Matt's classes, so that turned out well. :) Erin and Lucy played outside and inside and watched Shaun the Sheep. We asked Lucy if she would like Erin to come over and play again and got an enthusiastic YES! Erin came by later to return our keys, and Lucy cried when she left. She told me, "Me sad friend Erin go." And Erin liked it well enough to be willing to do it again sometime.
We changed our 35-1 appointment from Thursday at 8:30 to Friday at 10:30 so that Matt wouldn't have to cancel Thursday classes again next week. We were lucky they could fit us in. Erin said she could watch Lucy after noon. Now we just have to find somebody for 10-noon.
Between Tuesday and today, we spent at least 11 hours getting medical care for Emmie. We certainly hope future appointments are less dramatic and time-consuming.
Tuesday, April 19, 2016
34ish Week Appointment: A Long, Long Day
I was not really looking forward to having an OB appointment on Neil's birthday, but this one was worse than I had hoped but not as bad as it could have been. First, Emmie did not pass her BPP. She moved just fine, but she refused to show off her breathing. So we were going to have to go to the hospital for a non-stress test. Second, they checked growth, and Emmie seems to have fallen off of her growth curve. Her overall percentile was 16%. It had been in the 30s. Like her siblings, her femurs are short, which will drag down the percentile. (Although short fetal femurs mean little to height as she ages. Lucy had short femurs, and her height is in the 90th percentile at 2.5 years.) We're also not sure that they're getting an accurate head measurement because of her position. That would also drag down the percentile. Her abdomen is around the 50th percentile. At 4.5 pounds, her weight is in the 30s percentile-wise. So there are enough excuses to believe that she's not really at the 16th percentile. And we were told that the abdomen size is a better predictor of her health than the other measurements. But we are us, so they did two more ultrasounds and some blood work to check for infections. The ultrasounds were to check for blood flow in her brain and umbilical cord. The umbilical cord blood flow was fine, but they had trouble getting a good angle on her brain because of how low she is. Dr. Reynold's response was to have them follow up with a vaginal ultrasound to see if they could see the head better from that angle. They tried and tried and tried, which irritated Emmie enough that she was punching, kicking, and moving her head around to make it impossible to record anything about her brain. So they gave up on checking brain blood flow and sent us to the hospital for the NST. Emmie did really well on the NST. The nurse, who I recognized from Lucy's birth because she LOVED Lucy, was impressed with her heart read-out. Emmie fought the fetal monitor a little, but I think she was worn out from protesting the vaginal ultrasound. The lab tech who took my blood was really nice and took extra just in case they thought of something else to test, which knowing doctor Reynolds was a good idea.
Dr. Reynolds decided that we should start going for BPPs twice a week and despite whether Emmie passes them or not, we'll also go to the hospital for non-stress tests (NSTs) every time. We had weekly appointments already set, but they had to scramble and double book ultrasounds for the Thursday appointments, which they couldn't always get at times which work well with Matt's schedule. So he's going to have to cancel classes, and we're going to have to find childcare for Lucy because we can't expect Shawn and Susie to drop everything twice a week for keep her. And we won't know for sure how long we'll need someone to watch her each time. If they've double-booked the ultrasounds, I'm not sure how long we'll have to wait. The BPPs can take as long as 30 minutes. Then we'll see a doctor. Then we'll check into the hospital for an NST that takes at least 30 more minutes. And hopefully, they find nothing wrong at any point, or they'll admit me to the hospital to get Emmie out. And taking Lucy with us isn't a good option with the NSTs being done in the hospital, even if Matt was willing to miss the ultrasound to keep Lucy in the waiting room. He'd have to keep Lucy out of the hospital, too. And both Matt and I want him present for anything in the future because there's actually a chance they'll find something and get Emmie out. And we'd have to do something with Lucy if they admitted me to the hospital. If it was an emergency, Matt might not get to be in the OR because he would be keeping or transporting Lucy. It's a lot to deal with and plan for.
I was pretty bummed by all of this and cried quite a bit. I was not emotionally ready for any bad news. They did admit that almost all of the precautions they are taking are because of Neil. Emmie's situation without our history would not cause this much alarm. But the last time we had a small baby, he died. He didn't die because he was small, but ultimately the problem was a blood flow issue. And if Emmie isn't growing, she might have a blood flow issue, too. The specialist in Louisville considered that I just have consistently under-performing placenta. If I had any doubt before (and I didn't really), today convinced me that this is my last placenta. We're not going through all of this again.
On the bright side, I lost a couple of pounds last week because of increased consumption of fresh produce and increased activity in my garden. And my blood pressure was fine and got better each time it was taken. And my fluid level was a little higher but still at the lower end of normal. If fluid dramatically increases or decreases, they'll get Emmie out. In fact, we're now doubting that we'll make it to 38 weeks. If they find the least reason to get her out at or after 36 weeks, they'll do it.
Lucy had a better day today than she did last Tuesday. She still cried when she was put into the red car. She legitimately does not like to ride in a car that is not her blue car. Because she had done it last week and she wasn't in quite as bad of a mood today, the crying was not as severe. She was also heading to the park with Shawn, which may have helped a little, too. She had already told us this morning that she wanted to go to the park. According to Shawn, they had a pretty good day. There were a few tantrums and other two-year-old behavior, but she didn't melt down or destroy anything. And she seemed to have a good time.
Now I just want to go to sleep. I'm worn out. Tomorrow I'll try to find someone to watch Lucy. Tomorrow I'll try to get more done around the house just in case. Tonight I'm taking a Tylenol PM and getting as much sleep as possible so that I have the energy to deal with tomorrow's problems.
Dr. Reynolds decided that we should start going for BPPs twice a week and despite whether Emmie passes them or not, we'll also go to the hospital for non-stress tests (NSTs) every time. We had weekly appointments already set, but they had to scramble and double book ultrasounds for the Thursday appointments, which they couldn't always get at times which work well with Matt's schedule. So he's going to have to cancel classes, and we're going to have to find childcare for Lucy because we can't expect Shawn and Susie to drop everything twice a week for keep her. And we won't know for sure how long we'll need someone to watch her each time. If they've double-booked the ultrasounds, I'm not sure how long we'll have to wait. The BPPs can take as long as 30 minutes. Then we'll see a doctor. Then we'll check into the hospital for an NST that takes at least 30 more minutes. And hopefully, they find nothing wrong at any point, or they'll admit me to the hospital to get Emmie out. And taking Lucy with us isn't a good option with the NSTs being done in the hospital, even if Matt was willing to miss the ultrasound to keep Lucy in the waiting room. He'd have to keep Lucy out of the hospital, too. And both Matt and I want him present for anything in the future because there's actually a chance they'll find something and get Emmie out. And we'd have to do something with Lucy if they admitted me to the hospital. If it was an emergency, Matt might not get to be in the OR because he would be keeping or transporting Lucy. It's a lot to deal with and plan for.
I was pretty bummed by all of this and cried quite a bit. I was not emotionally ready for any bad news. They did admit that almost all of the precautions they are taking are because of Neil. Emmie's situation without our history would not cause this much alarm. But the last time we had a small baby, he died. He didn't die because he was small, but ultimately the problem was a blood flow issue. And if Emmie isn't growing, she might have a blood flow issue, too. The specialist in Louisville considered that I just have consistently under-performing placenta. If I had any doubt before (and I didn't really), today convinced me that this is my last placenta. We're not going through all of this again.
On the bright side, I lost a couple of pounds last week because of increased consumption of fresh produce and increased activity in my garden. And my blood pressure was fine and got better each time it was taken. And my fluid level was a little higher but still at the lower end of normal. If fluid dramatically increases or decreases, they'll get Emmie out. In fact, we're now doubting that we'll make it to 38 weeks. If they find the least reason to get her out at or after 36 weeks, they'll do it.
Lucy had a better day today than she did last Tuesday. She still cried when she was put into the red car. She legitimately does not like to ride in a car that is not her blue car. Because she had done it last week and she wasn't in quite as bad of a mood today, the crying was not as severe. She was also heading to the park with Shawn, which may have helped a little, too. She had already told us this morning that she wanted to go to the park. According to Shawn, they had a pretty good day. There were a few tantrums and other two-year-old behavior, but she didn't melt down or destroy anything. And she seemed to have a good time.
Now I just want to go to sleep. I'm worn out. Tomorrow I'll try to find someone to watch Lucy. Tomorrow I'll try to get more done around the house just in case. Tonight I'm taking a Tylenol PM and getting as much sleep as possible so that I have the energy to deal with tomorrow's problems.
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
33ish Week Appointment
All is well with me (gained a little weight, lower blood pressure and fluid are still within acceptable range) and Emmie (passed her BPP much more quickly). Dr. Ackermann says I don't need a DTAP because I got one when I had Lucy. To clarify exactly what date we were looking at as 38 weeks since our weeks change on Wednesdays while they normally schedule c-sections for Monday mornings, I asked whether we would be going on the Monday that is 37 weeks, 5 days or the Monday that is 38, weeks 5 days. He said we'd go on Wednesday when we're officially at 38 weeks. The date doesn't matter much to him he said, but the government is keeping an eye on early deliveries because some doctors have scheduled deliveries for their own convenience at the expense of newborn health. He said we can go ahead and schedule the c-section. The receptionist did not schedule it yet, and Dr. Reynolds may come up with a reason for a Monday delivery, so nothing is set. Wednesday would give Matt a couple days to recover from the semester and help me with final house preparations, and it would mean that Susie would get back in time to help with Lucy. That would be good. Of course, all that assumes that we don't run into problems before then. Dr. Ackermann said that if my fluids are low or I'm having contractions at 36 weeks, they'll get Emmie out. And I'm with Matt; if it was safe to get her out today, we'd vote for that. I want her to be fully developed and healthy, but I also want her to be alive, which she certainly is today.
The possibility that Susie would be back in time to help with Lucy could not have come on a better day. We experienced why you really need two people to keep up with Lucy. Lucy had a rough day and made Susie's day pretty rough, too. Lucy was tired and out of sorts but excited to play with Shawn and Susie, so I thought everything would be OK. Then we started hooking up the car seat in Susie's car, and Lucy lost it. She screamed and cried and tried to run away. "No ride in Susie's red car. Me ride blue car." She has ridden with Susie before, so this was unexpected. We had to hold her down to get her into the car seat. I could tell that she would fall asleep in the car. I had estimated 5-7 minutes. Apparently, she screamed for 15 minutes. She would start to doze and rouse herself to scream some more. Eventually, she did sleep until Susie had to stop for gas. Then the crying started again. When Shawn got out of a meeting, they took Lucy to a park, and she was happy to run around. Susie told Shawn it was his job to get her back into the car. Shawn just said, "Lucy, do you want to go see your mom? Let's get in the car." And she hopped right in. I'm sure the incentive was important, but the asker probably also affected the outcome. Lucy would do nearly anything for Shawn. He keeps marvelling at how weird it is to have a girl like him and want to sit by him. Well, most girls don't have the bearded, bespectacled academic as their paradigm for manhood. To Lucy it's just like having another daddy in a slightly different shade. :) And Lucy loves her daddy. However, no one is like mama. Mama is just barely a separate person from Lucy, so it's not possible to have mama in another shade, even though Susie would be a good fit for "mama in a different shade" if such a thing were possible.
It was tough to see Lucy so unhappy when we left. I knew she would be fine. She would be safe and cared for and loved. I was also pretty sure that my leaving was not exactly what was causing the meltdown. She was tired, and her idea of what was going to happen was not being met. If we had dropped her at their house or left her on campus in the stroller, she probably wouldn't have shed a tear. She did talk this evening a little about how mama and daddy were gone today. That seemed to bother her only a little. She was adamant, however, that she did not want to ride in the red car again. Appparently, her attachment to our car was more important than her attachment to her parents. :) We'll work on the car thing.
The possibility that Susie would be back in time to help with Lucy could not have come on a better day. We experienced why you really need two people to keep up with Lucy. Lucy had a rough day and made Susie's day pretty rough, too. Lucy was tired and out of sorts but excited to play with Shawn and Susie, so I thought everything would be OK. Then we started hooking up the car seat in Susie's car, and Lucy lost it. She screamed and cried and tried to run away. "No ride in Susie's red car. Me ride blue car." She has ridden with Susie before, so this was unexpected. We had to hold her down to get her into the car seat. I could tell that she would fall asleep in the car. I had estimated 5-7 minutes. Apparently, she screamed for 15 minutes. She would start to doze and rouse herself to scream some more. Eventually, she did sleep until Susie had to stop for gas. Then the crying started again. When Shawn got out of a meeting, they took Lucy to a park, and she was happy to run around. Susie told Shawn it was his job to get her back into the car. Shawn just said, "Lucy, do you want to go see your mom? Let's get in the car." And she hopped right in. I'm sure the incentive was important, but the asker probably also affected the outcome. Lucy would do nearly anything for Shawn. He keeps marvelling at how weird it is to have a girl like him and want to sit by him. Well, most girls don't have the bearded, bespectacled academic as their paradigm for manhood. To Lucy it's just like having another daddy in a slightly different shade. :) And Lucy loves her daddy. However, no one is like mama. Mama is just barely a separate person from Lucy, so it's not possible to have mama in another shade, even though Susie would be a good fit for "mama in a different shade" if such a thing were possible.
It was tough to see Lucy so unhappy when we left. I knew she would be fine. She would be safe and cared for and loved. I was also pretty sure that my leaving was not exactly what was causing the meltdown. She was tired, and her idea of what was going to happen was not being met. If we had dropped her at their house or left her on campus in the stroller, she probably wouldn't have shed a tear. She did talk this evening a little about how mama and daddy were gone today. That seemed to bother her only a little. She was adamant, however, that she did not want to ride in the red car again. Appparently, her attachment to our car was more important than her attachment to her parents. :) We'll work on the car thing.
Saturday, April 9, 2016
A Day with Lucy: Balance, Discipline, Imagination, and Cheese
Lucy hasn't made much progress with her swimming lately. I haven't pushed her to try new things. I'm just happy that she's happy paddling in the water so that I can move around and stretch. Yesterday she decided to try floating on her back with her vest. It's hard to do because the vest slips from side to side, so she has to keep re-balancing herself as it slips. Fortunately, balance is one of Lucy's specialties. She kept trying and trying until she was able to stay on her back and kick her legs to swim backwards. I wanted to see if she could do it without the vest, but she didn't want to experiment. Eventually, we'll try it. I think she's mastered the hard parts already. She can balance herself and overcome her instinct to panic while lying in water. If she has any buoyancy at all (more like her mother than her father), she should take to floating.
We had another interesting development with Lucy yesterday. She took apart a little bit of a wall that was already cracked. It was a small patch in an inconspicuous area. She left the bits she had broken off all over the floor in the hall. When I saw it, I told her she had to clean up her mess. At first, she seemed to like the idea of using the hand broom to sweep the hall, but then she lost interest and refused to clean. So I told her she couldn't watch TV or play with the tablet until her mess was cleaned up. She turned and started playing with some of her toys. We ate lunch. She asked to watch TV. I reminded her that she couldn't watch TV until the mess was cleaned up. She played with her toys some more. Then she sat in Matt's chair, which is her TV spot when he's not home. Suddenly, she hopped up and ran to the hall saying, "Mommy, help me sweep." I did help her, but she did a good deal of it herself. And then I asked her what she wanted to watch. The answer was "Dog Show" (Martha Speaks), her current favorite. We've watched it so much that even Emmie gets excited about the theme song, whether it's playing on the TV or being sung by Matt. Withholding something until Lucy complies has typically not worked with her. When she was younger, she would rather go without than say the word for what she wanted. It's worked a little better at meal times when we've said, "You can have another sip of Daddy's Dr Pepper after you eat another bite of dinner." It's a taking turns thing, and she seems to get that. But this was different. She considered the consequences and lived with them as long as she could stand, but eventually she initiated the action that would lift the ban. Matt said that if she really understands that kind of discipline, it opens up a whole new world for us. He's right. I hope this gives us some more discipline options. Our lack of options was getting frustrating. Removing her from situations, taking things away when she misused them, and talking to her weren't getting the results I was hoping for. And timeout didn't make any sense to her. She's a sweet girl who needs some discipline (as all children do), and now maybe we've found one way that works.
Lucy's imaginative play is taking off. She's played cooking and feeding fake food for a while. Caring for her baby dolls has been big for over a month. But today she did some new things. First, she pretended to pick handfuls of dirt from the living room floor (it's not dirty enough for actual handfuls of dirt) and throw them at me. Then she brought me a handful of "dirt" to throw at her. We threw dirt at each other for a while. She kept giggling and saying, "Me dirty." Eventually, I pretended to spit on my handful of dirt, form it into a ball, and throw mud balls at her with a "splat" sound effect thrown in. She thought that was great fun. She especially enjoyed the opportunity to pretend to spit. We played this for more than 10 minutes until she got hungry.
Later we went to Kroger to get a few things. Our Kroger sells grills and patio furniture and has some models set up near the front of the store. Lucy went to a grill and pretended to cook. Matt was impressed because we don't own a grill. She must have learned it from TV. Matt suggested that they make hamburgers and pretended to flip burgers on the grill. Lucy decided they should be cheeseburgers instead. She piggy-backed off of his idea and took it further. Then they sat at a table and ate their cheeseburgers. Then Lucy decided it was time to play a board game with Daddy at the table. Of course, Matt loved this idea. Lucy started calling colors and moving or taking imaginary pieces. I'm not sure the game has rules, but it had recognizable game mechanics. She had kind of invented her own game. She still doesn't get the concept of winning, so no one won, but she had a good time.
She later found a toy that she liked and wanted to take it home. Matt suggested that I give her something I had already bought to distract her. All I had were groceries, but I took out a package of feta cheese and offered it. She immediately dropped the toy and clutched the feta to her chest. She happily ate a third of the package of feta with at least a cup of grapes when she got home. After she ate, we got out a couple of German-made kids games that we've picked up through the years. Lucy really enjoyed the dice. Even with the game that only used one die, she shook that die before dropping it on the table. She didn't always want to hand the dice to the next player, but she did a pretty good job of taking turns. I think Matt may have a budding gaming buddy. He even said that if she takes to gaming, he's going to have to start looking for preschool games. And he doesn't mean Hi-Ho Cherry-O.
Lucy is a lot of fun. She's a handful because she's energetic, resourceful, and willful. None of those things is totally bad. They are just a lot to manage for her until she can manage herself.
We had another interesting development with Lucy yesterday. She took apart a little bit of a wall that was already cracked. It was a small patch in an inconspicuous area. She left the bits she had broken off all over the floor in the hall. When I saw it, I told her she had to clean up her mess. At first, she seemed to like the idea of using the hand broom to sweep the hall, but then she lost interest and refused to clean. So I told her she couldn't watch TV or play with the tablet until her mess was cleaned up. She turned and started playing with some of her toys. We ate lunch. She asked to watch TV. I reminded her that she couldn't watch TV until the mess was cleaned up. She played with her toys some more. Then she sat in Matt's chair, which is her TV spot when he's not home. Suddenly, she hopped up and ran to the hall saying, "Mommy, help me sweep." I did help her, but she did a good deal of it herself. And then I asked her what she wanted to watch. The answer was "Dog Show" (Martha Speaks), her current favorite. We've watched it so much that even Emmie gets excited about the theme song, whether it's playing on the TV or being sung by Matt. Withholding something until Lucy complies has typically not worked with her. When she was younger, she would rather go without than say the word for what she wanted. It's worked a little better at meal times when we've said, "You can have another sip of Daddy's Dr Pepper after you eat another bite of dinner." It's a taking turns thing, and she seems to get that. But this was different. She considered the consequences and lived with them as long as she could stand, but eventually she initiated the action that would lift the ban. Matt said that if she really understands that kind of discipline, it opens up a whole new world for us. He's right. I hope this gives us some more discipline options. Our lack of options was getting frustrating. Removing her from situations, taking things away when she misused them, and talking to her weren't getting the results I was hoping for. And timeout didn't make any sense to her. She's a sweet girl who needs some discipline (as all children do), and now maybe we've found one way that works.
Lucy's imaginative play is taking off. She's played cooking and feeding fake food for a while. Caring for her baby dolls has been big for over a month. But today she did some new things. First, she pretended to pick handfuls of dirt from the living room floor (it's not dirty enough for actual handfuls of dirt) and throw them at me. Then she brought me a handful of "dirt" to throw at her. We threw dirt at each other for a while. She kept giggling and saying, "Me dirty." Eventually, I pretended to spit on my handful of dirt, form it into a ball, and throw mud balls at her with a "splat" sound effect thrown in. She thought that was great fun. She especially enjoyed the opportunity to pretend to spit. We played this for more than 10 minutes until she got hungry.
Later we went to Kroger to get a few things. Our Kroger sells grills and patio furniture and has some models set up near the front of the store. Lucy went to a grill and pretended to cook. Matt was impressed because we don't own a grill. She must have learned it from TV. Matt suggested that they make hamburgers and pretended to flip burgers on the grill. Lucy decided they should be cheeseburgers instead. She piggy-backed off of his idea and took it further. Then they sat at a table and ate their cheeseburgers. Then Lucy decided it was time to play a board game with Daddy at the table. Of course, Matt loved this idea. Lucy started calling colors and moving or taking imaginary pieces. I'm not sure the game has rules, but it had recognizable game mechanics. She had kind of invented her own game. She still doesn't get the concept of winning, so no one won, but she had a good time.
She later found a toy that she liked and wanted to take it home. Matt suggested that I give her something I had already bought to distract her. All I had were groceries, but I took out a package of feta cheese and offered it. She immediately dropped the toy and clutched the feta to her chest. She happily ate a third of the package of feta with at least a cup of grapes when she got home. After she ate, we got out a couple of German-made kids games that we've picked up through the years. Lucy really enjoyed the dice. Even with the game that only used one die, she shook that die before dropping it on the table. She didn't always want to hand the dice to the next player, but she did a pretty good job of taking turns. I think Matt may have a budding gaming buddy. He even said that if she takes to gaming, he's going to have to start looking for preschool games. And he doesn't mean Hi-Ho Cherry-O.
Lucy is a lot of fun. She's a handful because she's energetic, resourceful, and willful. None of those things is totally bad. They are just a lot to manage for her until she can manage herself.
Thursday, April 7, 2016
Mechanical and Technological Disappointments
First, the used double stroller I got will be of limited use. I got it cleaned up and took Lucy for a ride and discovered that the stroller was wobbly and pulling to the right. I stopped and checked the wheels and found one of them was bent. I immediately turned back around and went home. I tried to straighten out the wheel, but I may have made it worse. I don't remember the wheel being bent when I got it, but I didn't really try it out. It's also possible that the wheel bent when Lucy got into the stroller before it was fully open and it closed on her and fell over. I quickly pulled her out, and one of the wheels popped off. I easily put the wheel back on, but it might have been bent in all of the excitement. The stroller is probably good enough for going to the pool for a while. I'm not sure I'd want to fight the pulling to the right all the way to Matt's office, especially since I'd have to fight it all the way home from his office. We'll still probably get $20 of use out of it just going to the pool, but it's not going to be a long-term stroller for us. We will need another stroller.
My other disappointment is my search for an inexpensive device that can run the Ibotta app. Ibotta gives rebates when you buy certain products and scan your receipt. Because it's a rebate, it can be stacked with sales and coupons to get really good deals. Recently, there was a $5 off diapers rebate. That would have been nice. But the app requires Android version 3.0 or higher and a rear-facing camera with auto-focus. We don't own smart phones, and our Android tablets run a proprietary version from Amazon because they are Kindle Fires. There are plenty of cheap tablets with new enough version of Android, but they don't meet the camera requirements. I've had trouble finding a tablet for less than $200 that does meet the requirements. I can't justify a $200 tablet so that I can save $5 on diapers. I looked into Apple products that can run the app, but they have to be fairly new, which mean expensive. I even looked for used ones on Ebay since I don't mind some physical imperfections. But if you'd like to actually be able to read the screen and use the device because it's not already attached to some unknown account, it will cost over $100. Still not cheap enough for a device just to run a rebate app. So if you have a smart phone, Ibotta is great. If you're thrifty and don't have fairly up-to-date devices, you can't save money with Ibotta. That's disppointing.
My other disappointment is my search for an inexpensive device that can run the Ibotta app. Ibotta gives rebates when you buy certain products and scan your receipt. Because it's a rebate, it can be stacked with sales and coupons to get really good deals. Recently, there was a $5 off diapers rebate. That would have been nice. But the app requires Android version 3.0 or higher and a rear-facing camera with auto-focus. We don't own smart phones, and our Android tablets run a proprietary version from Amazon because they are Kindle Fires. There are plenty of cheap tablets with new enough version of Android, but they don't meet the camera requirements. I've had trouble finding a tablet for less than $200 that does meet the requirements. I can't justify a $200 tablet so that I can save $5 on diapers. I looked into Apple products that can run the app, but they have to be fairly new, which mean expensive. I even looked for used ones on Ebay since I don't mind some physical imperfections. But if you'd like to actually be able to read the screen and use the device because it's not already attached to some unknown account, it will cost over $100. Still not cheap enough for a device just to run a rebate app. So if you have a smart phone, Ibotta is great. If you're thrifty and don't have fairly up-to-date devices, you can't save money with Ibotta. That's disppointing.
Reasonable Pain
I'm understandably anxious about my health while pregnant. I try to limit my fears to reasonable ones. There are so many to have. It seems that everything is dangerous for pregnant women. We should all be packed in bubble wrap and fed a safe solution of necessary nutrients so that we don't accidentally eat fish with too much mercury or lettuce or lunch meat with listeria (one I do worry about after the salad recall that cleared Kroger's shelves) or cats (a joke from my first visit with nurse during my first pregnancy). Every visit with my OB includes a list of things to watch for and entreaties to come to the hospital if I have any of those problems. I always tell them, "Don't worry. If anything is troubling, I will absolutely come to the hospital." The trouble is figuring out whether something is troubling. Blood is always troubling and would, of course, send me to the hospital. But what about the symptoms for preeclampsia? Headache and swelling of face, hands, or feet. Is every headache a potential problem? If I have a headache and swollen ankles (fairly common late in pregnancy), is that a problem? And since my cervix was measured and found short, which tends to happen in women with a history of pre-term labor, should I scrutinize every ache and pain to make sure it's not a contraction? If I have a headache, I ask Matt if I look puffy. He's honest, so I don't worry about his saying, "No, dear, you look radiant." If I hurt, I sit down and sometimes take some Tylenol. Tylenol wouldn't do anything for labor pains, so if it helps, I'm probably not in labor. I also try to consider what I was doing before the pain started. Did I over-exert? Did I lift something lighter than a cast iron dutch oven that was still too heavy for me?
So today I hurt and had a headache. I was fairly certain that both were caused by unusual exertion, but I hurt pretty bad. The unusual exertion was running across campus to catch Lucy. She wanted to play on the steps under the clock tower (one of her favorite things to do) while Matt dropped off some paperwork at an office, so I said I could handle watching her while she played on the steps. We were fine for a while. Then she headed down the sidewalk between the theater and Carter Hall. I followed. She picked up speed, so I told her to stop. That's when she bolted. She ran downhill toward the chapel, which is bordered on two sides by roads and on another side by a parking lot. She turned toward the road she would have to cross to get to Chik-Fil-A. I ran as fast as I could and faster than I should have to catch her before she got to the road. Just in front of the chapel, I grabbed her hair because that was what I could reach and stopped her. Both panting, we collapsed in the grass. "Mama pull me hair" was Lucy's response. "I can't take you anywhere. I can't keep up with you to keep you safe" was my response. If I can't watch her for a few minutes on campus, I really can't take her anywhere. What if I had fallen? What if I hadn't reached Lucy before she reached the road? I took her hand and walked her back up the hill with only a little protest from her, which is fortunate because I couldn't have carried her up the hill. We would have had to sit and wait for Matt to find us.
So I hurt bad. I had a headache. I felt like I had strained something in my lower abdomen. My back hurt, both through my ribs and my lower back. I started having small back spasms, which were potentially concerning after the back labor I had with Lucy. Quite honestly, everything below my hair and above my knees hurt. I was also a little worried about the jostling that Emmie got, but she didn't seem to mind. She's stayed perky this afternoon and evening. I took Tylenol and lay down for a nap after we got home. I woke up about 45 minutes later and still hurt, so I rolled over and napped some more. A little later, I felt a little better but still hurt, so I rolled over and napped some more. I napped until I stopped hurting. I'm still a little sore and stiff and have taken more Tylenol. The good news is that this is reasonable pain with an identifiable cause, not the alarming kind that would send me to the hospital. But until the Tylenol and napping kicked in, I was a bit worried as well as sore and exhausted. That's not a fun combination.
Lucy is indefinitely grounded, especially since telling her to stop made her run. I'm not taking her anywhere alone without her being strapped into a stroller or cart. I can't do it while I'm pregnant or recovering or hauling around a newborn. I like for her to move around and explore, but keeping her alive and safe is a higher priority. I'm sure it will hurt her feelings sometimes that mama won't let her run, but that, too, is a reasonable pain.
So today I hurt and had a headache. I was fairly certain that both were caused by unusual exertion, but I hurt pretty bad. The unusual exertion was running across campus to catch Lucy. She wanted to play on the steps under the clock tower (one of her favorite things to do) while Matt dropped off some paperwork at an office, so I said I could handle watching her while she played on the steps. We were fine for a while. Then she headed down the sidewalk between the theater and Carter Hall. I followed. She picked up speed, so I told her to stop. That's when she bolted. She ran downhill toward the chapel, which is bordered on two sides by roads and on another side by a parking lot. She turned toward the road she would have to cross to get to Chik-Fil-A. I ran as fast as I could and faster than I should have to catch her before she got to the road. Just in front of the chapel, I grabbed her hair because that was what I could reach and stopped her. Both panting, we collapsed in the grass. "Mama pull me hair" was Lucy's response. "I can't take you anywhere. I can't keep up with you to keep you safe" was my response. If I can't watch her for a few minutes on campus, I really can't take her anywhere. What if I had fallen? What if I hadn't reached Lucy before she reached the road? I took her hand and walked her back up the hill with only a little protest from her, which is fortunate because I couldn't have carried her up the hill. We would have had to sit and wait for Matt to find us.
So I hurt bad. I had a headache. I felt like I had strained something in my lower abdomen. My back hurt, both through my ribs and my lower back. I started having small back spasms, which were potentially concerning after the back labor I had with Lucy. Quite honestly, everything below my hair and above my knees hurt. I was also a little worried about the jostling that Emmie got, but she didn't seem to mind. She's stayed perky this afternoon and evening. I took Tylenol and lay down for a nap after we got home. I woke up about 45 minutes later and still hurt, so I rolled over and napped some more. A little later, I felt a little better but still hurt, so I rolled over and napped some more. I napped until I stopped hurting. I'm still a little sore and stiff and have taken more Tylenol. The good news is that this is reasonable pain with an identifiable cause, not the alarming kind that would send me to the hospital. But until the Tylenol and napping kicked in, I was a bit worried as well as sore and exhausted. That's not a fun combination.
Lucy is indefinitely grounded, especially since telling her to stop made her run. I'm not taking her anywhere alone without her being strapped into a stroller or cart. I can't do it while I'm pregnant or recovering or hauling around a newborn. I like for her to move around and explore, but keeping her alive and safe is a higher priority. I'm sure it will hurt her feelings sometimes that mama won't let her run, but that, too, is a reasonable pain.
Tuesday, April 5, 2016
Sweet Baby
Very gradually, I've been getting things ready for Emmie's arrival. I've washed all the newborn clothes and some of the 0-3 month clothes and put them away in drawers. Yesterday, I marked a couple more things off my list. I cleared all of the stuff that had accumulated on the changing table, wiped it down, tightened the screws, and put a clean cover on the changing pad.
When Lucy saw it, she was very excited about the changing table and ran to get one of her dolls. She announced that her baby was poopy and needed to be changed on the changing table. I got her a stool and helped her buckle the belt (the "feetbelt" as Lucy called it). She undressed her baby, took the diaper off, and asked for a wipe. I got her a wipe, and she wiped the babies bottom thoroughly and announced, "All treen (clean)." She is unable to dress or diaper the baby by herself, so I did that part. Within three minutes, that baby doll was poopy again, and we went through the same routine again. And three minutes later, it happened again. Poopy baby was THE game to play all day and part of this morning. She did take a break yesterday when the baby needed to sleep on the changing table. Lucy kept saying something that sounded like "sheep dreams," which with her is a real possibility. Eventually, I figured out that she was saying "sweet dreams" as she was tucking the baby in. She must have picked it up from TV because we don't say that to her. I tend to say "sleep well" because I care more about the quality of her sleep than the flavor of her dreams. A little while later Lucy stood beside the changing table rubbing the baby's head saying, "Sweet baby. Sweet baby." Now that sounds like something she's heard. When Matt came home, he got to be the one who diapered and dressed the poopy baby. It was very cute and very sweet of Lucy to be so nurturing. Her first instinct when something isn't right iss to help or to fix it. If a baby in a store cries, she wants to help. If something on a TV program breaks, she wants to fix it. If someone in a book is dirty, she wasnts to help them wash. If she spills someting, she wants to clean it. In fact , she did that today at Shawn and Susie's. They had some clean laundry sitting out, and Lucy grabbed a pair of pants to clean up something she spilled. Now we need to teach her to do laundry. Actually, she does help me put clothes into the washer and dryer, so she would have been happy to help wash the pants.
(She also counted to 15 that day. It was a big day for her.)
After the changing table, I dusted corners and walls, washed and rehung the curtains, and swept a little. I still need to do some tidying and clean the floors thoroughly. We need to put in some shelving, convert the crib to a toddler bed for Lucy, and move the cradle into the nursery. Then at least the nursery will be ready. Once that's in good shape, I'll turn my attention to the rest of the house.
It feels like things are coming together. And it makes me feel good knowing that Lucy wants to be nurturuing and helpful. I'm still concerned about caring for two kids, especially while I'm recovering. I know Matt will take care of most things, but sometimes only mama will do, and I want to be able to cuddle and interact with both of my girls. We'll make it work somehow.
When Lucy saw it, she was very excited about the changing table and ran to get one of her dolls. She announced that her baby was poopy and needed to be changed on the changing table. I got her a stool and helped her buckle the belt (the "feetbelt" as Lucy called it). She undressed her baby, took the diaper off, and asked for a wipe. I got her a wipe, and she wiped the babies bottom thoroughly and announced, "All treen (clean)." She is unable to dress or diaper the baby by herself, so I did that part. Within three minutes, that baby doll was poopy again, and we went through the same routine again. And three minutes later, it happened again. Poopy baby was THE game to play all day and part of this morning. She did take a break yesterday when the baby needed to sleep on the changing table. Lucy kept saying something that sounded like "sheep dreams," which with her is a real possibility. Eventually, I figured out that she was saying "sweet dreams" as she was tucking the baby in. She must have picked it up from TV because we don't say that to her. I tend to say "sleep well" because I care more about the quality of her sleep than the flavor of her dreams. A little while later Lucy stood beside the changing table rubbing the baby's head saying, "Sweet baby. Sweet baby." Now that sounds like something she's heard. When Matt came home, he got to be the one who diapered and dressed the poopy baby. It was very cute and very sweet of Lucy to be so nurturing. Her first instinct when something isn't right iss to help or to fix it. If a baby in a store cries, she wants to help. If something on a TV program breaks, she wants to fix it. If someone in a book is dirty, she wasnts to help them wash. If she spills someting, she wants to clean it. In fact , she did that today at Shawn and Susie's. They had some clean laundry sitting out, and Lucy grabbed a pair of pants to clean up something she spilled. Now we need to teach her to do laundry. Actually, she does help me put clothes into the washer and dryer, so she would have been happy to help wash the pants.
(She also counted to 15 that day. It was a big day for her.)
After the changing table, I dusted corners and walls, washed and rehung the curtains, and swept a little. I still need to do some tidying and clean the floors thoroughly. We need to put in some shelving, convert the crib to a toddler bed for Lucy, and move the cradle into the nursery. Then at least the nursery will be ready. Once that's in good shape, I'll turn my attention to the rest of the house.
It feels like things are coming together. And it makes me feel good knowing that Lucy wants to be nurturuing and helpful. I'm still concerned about caring for two kids, especially while I'm recovering. I know Matt will take care of most things, but sometimes only mama will do, and I want to be able to cuddle and interact with both of my girls. We'll make it work somehow.
Down to the Wire
Today we started weekly appointments with ultrasounds for biophysical profiles (BPPs). To pass the BPP, Emmie has to move a little and show off her breathing skills. She was reluctant to do either. She moved a little when Jenny (the ultrasound tech who we've gotten to know fairly well because of all of our BPPs through 3 pregnancies) poked my belly with the ultrasound wand. Emmie wasn't seriously disturbed, but she wiggled a little. And she tried breathing once. There's a certain number of times she's supposed to breathe within a certain time period. So we waited for her to breathe some more. And we waited. And we waited. And I turned on my side to see if that would get her to do something. It didn't. And we tried talking. And I tried humming. I tried sucking snot from my sinuses to my throat, which sometimes gets me kicked (but not all the time like Neil used to do). Nothing we did seemed to matter much. And I didn't have any snacks with me to try eating something. Then I asked what the likelihood of having to go to the hospital for a non-stress test was if Emmie didn't show off her breathing in time. The answer was 100% if she doesn't breathe in the next 25 seconds. I find non-stress tests to be very stressful, so I sat up a little and said, "Breathe, Emmie. We don't want to go to the hospital." And she started breathing. And she passed her BPP at the last second. Whew! My fluid was on the low side of normal, which for me is better than the high end of normal, which might signal a blood sugar issue, which they are looking for.
My blood pressure was excellent. My weight gain was reasonable, especially considering all the fast food we've eaten in the last week while I've been in a funk. Dr. Reynolds is very pleased with how things were going. And he thinks that Paul Ryan will be the Republican nominee for president. It's one of the least far-out things he's probably ever said to us while talking about something non-pregnancy. :)
I also asked about what he was thinking about timing for Emmie's arrival. We have been assuming 38 weeks (like with Lucy) unless they get antsy and move it to 37 weeks or unless at any visit in the next 8 weeks there's a problem that indicates that immediate delivery is best. He seemed to think the 37 week idea was crazy. I was asking because Susie has to be out of town on the Monday of 38 weeks, the likely delivery date. So Shawn would have Lucy by himself... overnight. Lucy loves Shawn, and Shawn loves Lucy, so we know they'd be fine together, but Lucy with one caregiver at night can be a handful. If worse came to worst, Matt could go home at night. I think we'd both feel better if he could stay at the hospital with me for at least the first 24 hours. But if the c-section is first thing in the morning, then he could be around for at least the first 12 and come back the next morning. We'll make it work. We've got about a month to work the kinks out of our plan and attempt any necessary behavior modifications for Lucy (or Shawn for that matter). :)
It was another long day, but because Emmie passed her BPP, it wasn't as long as it could have been. Hopefully, she doesn't put us through this every week.
My blood pressure was excellent. My weight gain was reasonable, especially considering all the fast food we've eaten in the last week while I've been in a funk. Dr. Reynolds is very pleased with how things were going. And he thinks that Paul Ryan will be the Republican nominee for president. It's one of the least far-out things he's probably ever said to us while talking about something non-pregnancy. :)
I also asked about what he was thinking about timing for Emmie's arrival. We have been assuming 38 weeks (like with Lucy) unless they get antsy and move it to 37 weeks or unless at any visit in the next 8 weeks there's a problem that indicates that immediate delivery is best. He seemed to think the 37 week idea was crazy. I was asking because Susie has to be out of town on the Monday of 38 weeks, the likely delivery date. So Shawn would have Lucy by himself... overnight. Lucy loves Shawn, and Shawn loves Lucy, so we know they'd be fine together, but Lucy with one caregiver at night can be a handful. If worse came to worst, Matt could go home at night. I think we'd both feel better if he could stay at the hospital with me for at least the first 24 hours. But if the c-section is first thing in the morning, then he could be around for at least the first 12 and come back the next morning. We'll make it work. We've got about a month to work the kinks out of our plan and attempt any necessary behavior modifications for Lucy (or Shawn for that matter). :)
It was another long day, but because Emmie passed her BPP, it wasn't as long as it could have been. Hopefully, she doesn't put us through this every week.
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